10 AM Gare du Nord
This post was originally written September 9, 2013
I spent my last week falling hard for a lovely Scottish man. We only had five days together but are both so sure of our feelings, which I realize sounds insane. At the same time, I'm at a time in my life where I've had enough romantic experiences, and know myself well enough, to know what I want and who is good for me.
He makes me laugh. He makes me feel like I can share every part of myself with him. Oddly enough, we met at a bar (I honestly didn't think it was possible to meet a decent human being at a bar) - one just a block away from me. I had walked over with a fairly large group of friends, as we had just been indulging in Moscow Mules at our housewarming party and needed to move to a bigger space. Tired, I sat on a stool to relax and a man with a lovely smile sat down next to me. Next thing I knew, we had spent half the night talking. We walked out together when the bar closed and I ached at the thought of him leaving me. He proclaimed that he couldn't leave me just yet, and we walked back to my place with the rest of my friends. As everyone else settled in for the night, we spoke for hours - until the sun rose! In the glow of my copper lamp, and while listening to likes of 'Keaton Henson' on the record player, we talked and talked and talked. We spoke about our lives, our families, our interests, ourselves.
I had never felt so strongly for someone so quickly. In the span of a few hours, I felt weirdly comfortable with him, like I had known him for at least a decade. After some intermittent napping, and more conversations, our group headed out for brunch. I was surprised by how normal it felt to spend time with him, to hold hands under the table, and give each other knowing smiles. I know that my friends were surprised - I was putting my head on the shoulder of a man I hardly knew! Late that afternoon, I drove him back to his hostel (after getting lost numerous times) and before we parted, we agreed we had to see each other again. Keep in mind this was early Sunday evening...and he was leaving on Wednesday.
A couple hours later, I nervously texted him letting him know my roommate, best friend and I would like to join his friends out for a night out on the town. Upon seeing each other again, we were giggly and awkward and it was wonderful. After about five minutes, we settled into being together and shared a kiss that I had been just about dying for. The escapades that night were random - our group traveled to a couple different bars and just generally had a fun evening. My English roommate was happy to have someone British around - she used quite a few colloquialisms I didn't recognize. When sharing breakfast as a group the next morning, my best friend told him that he felt like an old friend.
In such a short span of time, I knew how right he was for me, how much we could make each other happy. It's crazy, I know - but so are many of the best love stories. Each day we spent talking, laughing, and settling into each other. By the time Wednesday came, I was a total wreck - how could this great man just leave me life forever? However, he changed his plans and stayed an extra night so that he could spend more time with me. I was overjoyed.
The next morning, we sat in the car before leaving for the airport - we talked, I cried. We teased each other, took pictures, and tried to cherish our last moments. Life has been feeling pretty unfair, but I'm just so grateful that I got the time I did. What if his friends had gone to another bar that night? We actually came very close to never meeting each other. To know that someone can make me feel like this is such a blessing, I now know to never settle for less. However, I also know that it's rare - which is why I refuse to let go of him. His travels have taken him to Alaska, and our texts and conversations have only reassured everything I knew I felt in those first 12 hours. As for the future...who knows?
Life is magical, beautiful, & unexpected.